As some dedicated readers may recall, I work at a local computer store from time to time, usually in a sales/customer service capacity. You may also recall that I live in Macon with its fabulously ghetto population in eternal tango with the wealthy few that live dispersed around the city.
And, as with many other funny stories, the ghetto-ness will occasionally rear its head and vomit up a funny story. Today’s tale actually involves a letter (ahem, Business Letter) recently received from what appears to be a local accounting firm. I think the following needs no explanation. Please be aware that this is taken directly from the letter. I only wish I could disclose the origins of said letter…

MAY 11, 2006

SUJECT: SERVICE ORDER xxx

(computer store address, phone number, etc)

DEAR MANAGEMENT,

I WOULD LIKE TO NO, WILL THERE BE A PROBLEN TO PAY YOU ON A BI-WEEKLY
ON THE REPAIR OF THE FIRM LAD-TOP COMPUTER?

THE OWNER EXPLAIN TO US THAT THE COST IS

$ 350.00 DOLLARS
$ 40.00 DOLLARS (IN LABOR)
TOTAL _______
390.00 PLUS TAX

ALSO RETURN THE HARD DRIVE MOTOR THAT I DID NOT USE, I
HOPE IT WILL NOT BE A PROBLEM.

I BE MAIL THE PAYMENT TO YOU ON THE14TH OF MAY 2006 FROM THE
FLORIDA LOCATION, AND I BE THE RETURN THE PRODUCT TO ASAP OR
I CAN SHIP THE HARD DRIVE BEFORE THE 14TH IF YOU CAN CALL THE
FIRM ASAP BY THE FIRM EXPENSE.

THANK YOU IN THIS MATTER AND WAITING TO HEAR FROM YOU ALL,

(signed)

(the retarded hs dropout)

I am without words.